The Jump Off

I came to college full of excitement and enthusiasm for the new year to begin. A completely fresh start and no parents, what more could I ask for? Well after the initial shock set in I realized this wouldn't be a walk in the park. Everyone says college is so hard and I believed them of course but I wasn't prepared for this at all. In a way I don’t think anything could have prepared me for this. My sister went to college in California when I was 8 but she never told me much about what to expect. She warned me of dangers and my mother emphasized the importance of my studies but in the end there was nothing they could do.  It was all up to me to take my education into my own hands and I didn't do as well as I planned. I’m just getting by in some cases where I should be excelling, story of my life. But what they don’t tell you about college is reinvention is right around the corner. A month from now I’ll be starting all new classes with a fresh slate and a better grasp on the difficulty of college and the effort needed to succeed. A new year is just what I need so just like the other 6 billion people in the world who hope for a better year than the last I’m going to set out a list of my new year’s resolutions. Not only so I can reach my potential but also so I can get what I’m paying for here at southern.

First I want to buckle down and set rules for myself. Discipline is not a word I am familiar with so maybe adding that to my vocabulary will let me become a better person in all aspects of my life. I've never been one for studying but I know it’s a tool I need to start utilizing if I want to actually graduate. In Twyla Tharp’s book we talked about a box and where you should start while organizing your ideas. Well doing my homework at one in the morning the night before it due not only reduces the quality of my box but limits what I’ll have at my disposal to put inside of the box.

For my second resolution I need to dig deep and find the will to say no. No to going out every night, no to spending money on frivolous things, no to staying up all night, no to skipping class, no to those people whose approval I seek so dearly, people who could potentially drag me down with their extracurricular that are less than savory.  I could go on for days about those people but dwelling in the negative side of my life is something I would also like to say no to.

On the other side of saying no I’d like to start being a friend a friend would like to have. Yes studies are important and definitely my number one here at southern, but I can’t neglect the people who got me here. The friends who support me and my family are the people I need to start saying yes, and more importantly “thank you”, to.

Now this one might see silly but I couldn't be more serious. I need to learn how to spell. If I didn't have an iPhone my friends wouldn't even be able to read what I text them. For example, deffinatly, yes that is seriously how I spell definitely. It took me three tries to even have the correct word show up in the spell check. As embarrassing as it is I need to take care of the little things.

I wish I did this earlier but regret is a useless emotion so all I can do is learn from my mistakes and move forward with a fresh perspective on what this whole “college” thing is about.  

Final Assignment Reflection

Given many questions to answer I took a while to think about how I would organize these ideas without sounding choppy and dry. I could easily write pages answering the questions but as we were told not to do that I'm going to sit it out as a past present and future reflection. I'm worried that it might still sound too disjointed so I know I want to avoid that. not quite sure how I'll do that yet. I'm the kind of person that has to just jump in so I've decided to simply start writing it piece by piece and then revise it a few times. another concern is that I'll sound like I'm making excuses in the beginning. I planned on citing my high school education as a reason for my lazy nature but I don't want to fall into a pit of blaming things for my own faults. I've always hated people who make excuses and I don't want to be portrayed as a spoiled brat who is just complaining about a lacking educational system. In some ways I do blame them but I don't want to use that as a crutch. I want to write about the current semester and how I wish I did better but while staying away from the term "regret". I don't believe in regret and a lot of this class taught me about not regretting mistakes but learning from them as best I can. Learning is the point of all of this after all. I want to also touch on my plans for the future. I am staying for next semester and having learned the ropes of southern I now have a lot more resources to utilize  I'll touch on my experiences at the library and disability services center and how they assuaged my worry. Over all my biggest worry is the flow of the entire writing but that's a bridge I dont want to worry about crossing just yet.

video project #3

I finally did a video. I'm quit impressed with myself. I do regret not doing the other projects because now I see how easy it is. I wish I did the other ones so I would have more experience and know how to make a better video by now. I sort of hindered myself on this one because I didn't let myself get to my highest potential. I'm not disappointed by any means just sad that I could have done so much better with experience and that way my grade wouldn't be where it is. Instead of using problems you can solve easily I asked my friends what their real problems were that had solutions that were usually self remedied. most of the time the answer was to adapt. adapting is something no one told me I had to do when I got here. They told me how to do my laundry and things like that but no one said I just had to buckle down and get over it when in most cases that's the only answer.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k8ilgDXvQNg&feature=youtu.be

Creativity Overview

Twyla Tharp has a lot of ideas about creativity and suggestions about how to follow these ideas. Much of her book is examples of artists who taught her their methods whether directly or otherwise influenced her. Her ideas come from a fast pace approach the creativity in which one doesn't simply sit down and be creative but learns ways to harness their creativity. Maybe not applicable for all, her teachings seem geared towards adults in a field in which creativity is key. She, for instance, is a choreographer so creativity is her foundation. She asks us to step outside of the box and embrace our mistakes that society would otherwise tell us were failures. She has a positive outlook on the process and would seem to wish it utilized more in today's world. She knows the importance of a creative mind in any profession because without creativity we have nothing new or fresh to work with and we become sort of stuck in our old ways. We see creativity as something completely new but there is no such thing because as she says in the book everything comes from something else, there is no original thought. Creativity is simply the process of taking pieces of what we have and gluing them together in a different way. If we put more emphasis on individuality in the younger years of schooling perhaps that would be a conductor for teaching creativity. Children want so badly to be a mold of something they see or hear about because that's the way society is today, everyone fits into a mold. By teaching from a young age and beyond that you can be anything you want to be, we would feel more at ease with our creativity and fear less the rejection of others that may hold us back from overstepping our boundaries into something magnificent.

Great Horned Owl

I chose a more literal piece of artwork and I see it as a good fit given the video project for this week. The Lyman center is one of the great parts about southern that gives many opportunities for students to see shows and performances and that where I found this. The sculpture is called "Great Horned Owl" and I've never seen a horned owl before so why not? I assume from the plaque that Fred Apuzzo is the artist and it was donated in 1986. I believe the point of this piece is to advocate for the integrity of the school. It exemplifies the spirit of Southern Connecticut and what people get out of being here. It makes southern be seen as more than just a state school that hands out four year degrees like the stereotype suggests. I don't dislike the sculpture if you want my honest opinion. I wouldn't put it in my home but I wouldn't smash it on peoples driveways during Halloween either, I'm neutral on the subject. I think the plaque is more inspirational than anything. it uses the word enrichmnt and it makes me think of what I'm doing here. I'm trying to enritch myself and although I'm not sure is Fred Apuzo is the degigner or not, assuming he is, I think its pretty cool that he could come from a state school with such a talent. It is a very fine piece of art work and it must be pretty good for our school to choose to put it up in the center of the lyman building. Everyone goes there at some point so everyone sees that front and center. I cant judge art like that but from my nieve eye I see an acomplished piece of artwork worthy of its position

A Night on the Town

I didn't do anything fun on campus this week, unless you count eating all the marshmallows from the lucky charms at Conn, which I do. Besides destroying the cereal I went to a show that was absolutely the peek of my month. New haven is an amazing place for a girl like me. Music is my heart and soul quite literally and the reason I came to southern is for the amazing nightlife around the area. For instance there's a little club down the street called toads place, maybe you've heard of it. It entertains the masses with every genre of music having graced its puke stained steps. This past week a few of my friends and I went to see a band called '"The White Panda" which consists of two men I'm assuming of Chinese decent who wear masks and throw down the sickest beats over popular main stream songs you hear on the radio. They aren't very well known but my friends and I have been fans for years. It's a show worth your $30 ($20 with a southern I.D.). I believe the best feeling in the world is when you stand in front of a speaker and feel the vibrations throughout your body, even better when you know every word of every song. I was apprehensive about going considering I had a midterm the next day but I'm so glad I went. I see all my friends ripping their hair out over these exams for one reason or another and it's just depressing. Getting away for the night was more than refreshing for all of us. It's easy to get stuck here and become anxious and depressed over all the new pressures college presents so getting out and exploring new having is something I recommend for everyone. It's not this big bad city that everyone makes it out to be. the occasional homeless person looking for change and car drivers who don't yet understand the function of red lights is about as bad as it gets as long as you're not trooping around the slums alone. A bus pass and some bravery is all you need and the town is your oyster.

A Turning Point

Looking back on the previous half of this term I don't really see anything to be proud of. I see my grades on all the papers tests and quizzes I've done and all I see is average. There's nothing wrong with average its just so ordinary. I spent a lot of high school being average and I got bored so I decided to step it up and become really good at something, I chose music. I was in all the plays I was president of choir and my select ensemble, the whole nine yards. I traveled all over the country we went to Disney World twice, I really excelled. In order to continue I had to keep my grades up, I believe it was a 3.0 or better, so I did. I worked really hard and it felt good accomplishing something and being rewarded. Anyways, this term I haven't been doing so hot and I feel like the sudden lack of music in my life is the reason. I have no drive. I have no reason to take agency because I'm not being rewarded so I don't see the point of working hard. For some the satisfaction of seeing a good grade is enough but not for me, that just doesn't get me going like it should. Of course i want my parents to be proud but they love me so much I couldn't disappoint them if I tried. I feel disappointed in myself because I didn't study as much as I should, or at all for that matter. I'm glad I can look back and feel this way though, because it gives me the opportunity to turn it around. This half of the term will be better, it has to be. I have no choice at this point but to find a different creative outlet and get things done. I've started to utilize the library, you wouldn't believe what some peace and quiet does for my homework. I'm also thinking of getting a tutor. I need to step up my game without a doubt and with a new half of the term beginning this is the perfect opportunity to turn everything around and change for the better.

Don't rationalize, just feel.

I read the chapter on relationships because I'm a dysfunctional teen who grew up on Cinderella and the ideals that revolve around 2.3 kids, a white picket fence, and a golden retriever. This entire book is about how to change or sustain a good functioning life. The chapter on relationships was interesting because I think, above all else, love is all that matters in the world we live in. A long time ago relationships didn't matter as much as they do now. people married people and had children end of story. Now a days people get married and divorced like its nothing. Seeing that makes me believe in love as a more fragile thing than it ever was. It can be created and destroyed over and over again according to our social norms so I've always been confused as to who what when where and how I'll find my one and only, or if I'll find a few of those. Basically, I'm confused to the point that the intro of this blog might now even make sense to most. The bottom line is I could use a little help in the relationship department so that chapter was most appealing right off the bat. It talked about how fixed mindset people want revenge and expect magic while growth mindset people move on. Identifying as a fixed mindset person I believe this is true, I do hold grudges more often than I'd like. As for the magic part I don't see that as a negative characteristic. I think magic gives people hope and hope keeps some of us moving forward. Fixed mindsets are seen as a negative thing but believing in magic isn't bad it isn't wrong, maybe taken to an extreme but believing that someday my life will be like a Taylor Swift song is lovely in my opinion. You might say I'm blissfully ignorant but I like to think of it as optimistic, I know I wont graduate college by a miracle, I know magic wont give me a great job I love, but tell me why exactly I cant walk into a room and see my soul mate and just know deep down inside that they're the one. That doesn't sound so ridiculous to me, in fact that sounds beautiful and why can't love be beautiful magic? If only the book addressed that.

Terror? Oh yes, that sounds fun!

In case you couldn't tell my title is 100% sarcastic. Being scared does not sound like a good time to me. Why on earth would I want to put myself on the verge of tears? I simply don't understand the reasoning behind that. This weekend I was asked if I wanted to go to the trail of terror with my best friends and remembering my assignment to step outside of my comfort zone I agreed. I admit I was a little apprehensive considering my past experiences. I went three years ago and chickened out. I waited 5 hours got to the entrance and left. What a waste of time. Then I decided to be daring and try again the next year and I actually went in! okay so I might have cried a little, or a lot. But i learned a lesson, never EVER do that again. Never the less I decided to be brave, suck it up, and go. I went with my best friends and they all just had to bring up the day I chickened out. That was helpful. We walked up to the line and the terror ensued. People dressed up as dead little girls, midget devils that get in your face, zombie farmers that hang from trees, they went to extremes this year to insure people got what they paid for. The line wasn't so bad this year we only waited two hours and I'm not going to lie, I was mildly excited until the unthinkable happened. I was just standing there minding my own business when out of nowhere comes a bloody clown right up in my face. If you know me you know clowns are the end all be all of fears for me. I don't have a reason behind it, no repressed memories they just scare the living daylights out of me. I don't think I've ever screamed so loud in my life. After the little incident in line I was really thinking about turning back, but I didn't. I marched right into that tiny room and endured the entire trail. Honestly, I'm proud of myself, it may seem like a small feat of bravery but for me it was something I could really be proud of. I'm glad I did this, I actually proved something to myself about what I get out of the effort I put in.

New isn't always bad

I come from a town where football and cross town rivalries are a huge deal. School spirit is never in short supply as virtually my entire grade was apart of a group called 'the green machine'. Coming to southern I knew things were going to be different in that area. After attending my first football game I saw some blatant differences that somewhat bothered me. For one attendance even at a home game was a bit on the slim side. Cheerleaders were peppy as ever but that's not who I went to see. My high school band was huge maybe even as notorious as the football team and southern doesn't even have a band. Our drum line was interesting and the football team for its first win so I did enjoy myself. Although, I do miss the spark of electricity in the air as we crush yet another team. I'm getting accustomed to southern life and while the game wasn't what I'm used to I'm glad I attended to see our team take our first well deserved victory.

Reality check

The conversations in inquiry has resonated with me for the past few days. We're talking about our mindsets and it's made me take a step back and analyze my own life and how my mindset has changed since coming to college. During the in-class discussion I found myself to be a fixed minded person. I don't take initiative to move forward or better myself which is not a good trait in a college student, I admit. It was fine in high school to be good at something and make minimal improvement but here I am constantly expected to be better than I was the day before, a task i have found to be troublesome. I do want to better myself but there is one thing that keeps me from excelling, my lack of drive. I have no motivation at all to do well in classes I find trivial and under educating. for example my philosophy class is something I choose not to attend. I do the work and I will pass but attending class for an hour and fifteen minutes is almost unbearable. Perhaps attending class would better my mind but I simply don't care to retain what that class has to offer me. I have zero motivation to excel in philosophy so I choose to be average where it's easy and I'm comfortable. The opposite seems to be true for my inquiry class. I truly enjoy class time spent discussing the readings or previous class material but when it comes to extra work done outside of class i feel under stimulated therefore I lose interest and take no agency to do well. after reading about how I can be grouped into the fixed mindset category it really makes the reality of my laziness hit hard. All in all I can see this book as being one of the most important things I've ever read.

Dorm Life.

My easiest decision when going through colleges was whether i wanted to commute or not. Everyone told me to go away, where ever I go. Recently someone asked me how far away I lived and when I said 20 minutes they asked me why I lived here. I suppose it is silly that I live here when I could just commute for much less money. I wanted the entire experience and I have to say living here was the best decision I every made. I wonder if commuters only commute because they have to not because they want to so that's why I chose commuting verses living on campus as my topic for my video. I am genuinely interested in other peoples points of view on the subject. I chose this as a topic because its something I'm oblivious to, the option of commuting was never even given to me not that I'd take the opportunity. I know a lot of people who have commuted and then lived on campus and vise-versa and I'm interested to see who feels as if they made the right decision and why. I know my decision to stay here was the right one for me so I'm excited to share what I've learned with others.
I know going away from home seems like a hard thing to do but for me it was what i looked forward to all summer.i wanted to branch out and live in my own world surrounded by my friends. living alone is hard, yes, but its so exciting. It's a building full of kids just eating and studying and yelling and laughing and playing and its honestly the most fun I've ever had. I'm grateful for my opportunity to stay here and I wouldn't trade it for the world. So maybe this video project will change m mind and show me the advantage of commuting and why so many choose that road.

Miscellaneous=procrastination

When the assignment was given to record every hour of our days I have to say I was nervous. I knew there would be a lot of sleeping and eating but I didn't realize just how much time i spent on miscellaneous. Most nights are spent in the upstairs lobby doing homework yet i really don't get much work done in the end. I technically am doing homework but It's probably a sentence every half hour if I really focus. It wasn't so much the map of my time that opened my eyes but the result. I saw how many hours I spend "doing homework" and if i really spent all that time applying myself I would have finished every single blog for this class by now. Its a disappointing realization that I have terrible study skills. I've always been an average student but seeing it written down on paper that all my time Ins't adding up is disheartening. As corny as this sounds I think this assignment really made a difference in my life. I kind of see now that I need to completely remove myself from the world and get done what I came here to do or else my parents are paying for nothing. Not everyone has this opportunity and I feel as if I'm squandering it when I spend all my time just hanging around stressing out about all the work I have to do. We read in an article this week about how trying to change everything at once doesn't work and I think that's why I have had such a hard time managing my time here. Ive tried to do everything at once and make it all perfect when I need to take one step at a time. The first step being not thinking of all the work I have to do as motivation. Negative motivation doesn't work I recently found out so maybe I should spend more time actually doing things than talking about how unpleasant they will be.

Size doesn't matter.

Although high school I didn't really believe in being graded on my writing I was really excited about this assignment. the thing about writing is it isn't like math where you're either right or wrong. There's a lot of grey area because its basically opinion. I've given duplicate papers to different professorial and gotten drastically different critiques. So why are we given the task of judging others when its all just a matter of opinion? I do have a moral issue with this I do like judging, so I accept the challenge. 

I chose Weston's blog as my example of A work because it was refreshing after reading the same thing over and over again. I like individuality and I enjoy change so it was nice to see how he interprets things. I love how he embraces his differences of opinion. Most people would get discouraged but he keeps on going with what he feels is right. Even in class he does this. He may have a different pinion than me but as I've stated in previous entries I admire bravery. Popular opinion is that length is what makes a good entry but I disagree. When given a required length An entry can consist of ramblings and nonsense. I feel about Weston's blog how I feel about mini skirts, they're long enough to cover the important parts but short enough to keep me interested.

We're going to miss this.

When you graduate from high school everyone has an opinion or some words of wisdom. For some of reason everyone thinks they know the secret. Teachers, family, friends, everyone has their two cents that we absolutely have to hear. I've been told it all from 'stay safe' to 'enjoy the moment' to 'study hard'. Its hard to see whats right and whose just talking for the sake of talking. I'm quite the individual so anyone that gives me advice really has to know me. I don't need to be told how to cherish the moment and I don't need anyone looking over my shoulder pushing me to do my work. I have impeccable balance, and I don't mean that in a cocky way. My parents are polar opposites as are my sisters so I think that helps me know when its time to worry and when its time to savor the time I have here. I know I make it seem like I think I'm perfect but that's not the case. If I applied myself I could have straight A's but I've become comfortable with average. Maybe I enjoy the fun side of college a little too much but if I had one piece of advice to give to my peers its to enjoy every second of every moment. 30 years from now we'll all be sitting in out living rooms with out 3 kids and white picket fence looking forward to the PTA meeting next Tuesday and we'll wish we had back the Monday morning 8 AM lecture. These are without a doubt the best years of our lives and maybe its hard to see that now but we will always have these memories. Not necessarily of the Friday nights at the club but the Monday nights spent in the sixth floor lobby sharing a pizza listening to Taylor Swift and swapping stories about our awkward middle school days. That's what I'll cherish, that's what we all need to learn to enjoy to have a successful college experience, all the small things.

Convocation

While attending the new student convention I saw the president of Southern along with almost all of the most important people at the school.  Including almost all the deans of the different departments and the President of the Senior class here at Southern.  I also witnessed the introduction of the class of 2016 and the resolution of it too.  The messages that the speakers had portrayed to us was to do our best at Southern, try our hardest, and to put school first.  Also, that Southern truly is a great school, and that it has so much to offer.  The speakers messages really stuck to me and it made me think twice about how great Southern really is already to me.

Hard Work Vs. Talent

Yesterday we discussed hard work verses talent. An interesting point was brought up, weather or not students at Yale were smarter than us here at Southern. My definition of 'smarter' wasn't necessarily the same as everyone else's. I find intelligence to be exemplified when you look at your life and you are satisfied. Maybe even more than just satisfied, I think intelligence is happiness in a nutshell. Just because you've memorized a bunch of math equations it doesn't mean you're "smarter" than me it just means you are either better at retaining knowledge or have more motivation than I do. If you are happy in your little apartment down town flipping burgers for a living and you have you're health and that's all you need then more power to you. That may not be my idea of perfect but if you are exactly where you want to be doing exactly what you want to do then you must have made some pretty smart decisions to get to that place of perfect bliss. I do not think the girl who stays up until 3 AM studying at Yale to please her parents is smarter than me, a girl who goes to a state school taking on the exact amount of course work she can handle and still be able to maintain a social life. So that's my idea of 'smart', being happy. It takes hard work to be happy sometimes when you live by the american definition of the word. I for one do live in the real world where success in my career will equal happiness. I know that's not everyone feeling on the subject but I whole-heartily believe money can bring you happiness. With money you don't have to worry about much and a worry free life sounds good to me. Hard work will get me to where I want to be, not talent. and I believe intelligence comes from your own personal definition of the word happy. I don't think you are born with talent I think you cultivate it with hard work. There are extenuating factors that can cheat the system but lets assume we're not the exception, like Brian Clark Howard said ''Of course, privilege and luck can greatly ease the way, but there’s little substitute for 10,000 hours of work.''

Circumstance

When I was about five years old I received some news that would change my life forever. My sister was 16 and pregnant. I am the youngest of to sisters and we're 12 and 10 years apart. Its great to be the baby especially when there's no one even in the same vicinity to compete with for attention. This news was a major shock to my family but we adapt. Kayla was born and my life changed drastically. Now I know this doesn't sound like a hardship but for a fie year old its hard to understand. none of my friends had sisters or brothers that were having baby's and why wasn't she married? Isn't that how its supposed to go? I didn't understand the teen single mother situation that my sister was in. It's not anyone's  fault but I was left alone to deal with this. My parents had to take care of Jessica and her newborn and my other sister, Jennifer was only 15, she didn't want to deal with it either. So as time went on Jenny went away to college in California and  I was left alone in a house with a screaming three year old who was very stubborn and almost motherless. The thing about my sister is she didn't know what being a mother was so she was just my nieces friend for the most part. and when my mother was forced to take over that motherly roll I was put on a back burner. I'm not saying this is a traumatic event and I'm not saying it messed me up in any way but on the contrary. I think it taught me to be selfless, to put others first even when its so hard and I don't understand. Putting others before myself is something I hold as one of my best qualities that will carry me through college as someone everyone can count on no matter what.

Study Skills Enrichment.

I went to the office of the Study Skills Enrichment program and asked them what their main goal was for the fall semester. I recieved a few answers but one stood out in my mind. I was told about how they want to stress the importance of being a place anyone, freshman to senior, could go for help in any area. They value their position of being one of the most diverse programs on campus and hope to draw in those who need help. Self-improvement is their objective.
Here is a link to their webpage.

structure.

Beginnings are awfully important things. first impressions mean the world to some people these days. job interviews can drastically change your life and everyone remembers the first date so a blog should be no different. I feel as if you don't absolutely fall in love within the first page there isn't much promise for the future. I take first impressions very seriously. From the blogs I read I saw that there were a lot of different directions I could take mine. I could be emotional and make connections to my everyday life and pull at my readers heart  strings. on the other hand I could work it as an advice column and tell people what they should do to improve their lives. The second blog goes the way to be positive reinforcement for the reader. Then I was beginning to see that neither of those were ways I could go. they just weren't me. they weren't my style and I wasn't interested in writing about those things at this point in my life.Then I clicked on the third link. Kinda a Goldie Locks syndrome. One was too mushy one was too hard and one was just right. Rebeccablood.net is the blog i was most interested in. It was more of a free write. I believe the best ideas come from free thinking when you just let everything flow out of you all at once. That's what I want my blog to be. I want to be free to let everything come out with no reservations. Although, there is a downside to that. When I see blogs that are 'free' they can sometimes become disjointed or choppy. I've always struggled with letting my thoughts get away from me and flow into these little unconnected sentences that make no sense when put together. I'm hoping a routine writing project like this will give me some more structure in my life and writing until its Just right.

The great escape.

What does college mean to me? I guess I could rewrite my essay from freshman year when they asked me what high school meant to me. "Well, it's a great opportunity for a higher form of learning where I'll have more room to grow as an individual". While that is the cookie cutter B+ answer that's expected of me it's simply not how I feel anymore. Don't get me wrong, I'm grateful for the opportunity but for me college means I don't have to give those silly girl next door answers anymore. This place means freedom, freedom from my parents, a dress code, and all those other rules that I never really understood. I can be myself here, college is where I don't need anyone's approval, college is where I can speak my mind, college is where I'll wish I am when I'm 40 with three kids and a white picket fence. Everyone says these are the best years of our lives so who am I to disagree? Yes, school does come first but my own happiness is second to none. Academically that was a contradiction but I'm happy with the previous sentence so that's how it will stay. I hope that clears up any confusion about my priorities. I agree that getting good grades here is very important but I will say what I want to say here, I will stay true to myself. So here I am, with happiness and academics on an almost level playing field so where does my social life come in? I'd like to sit here and write about how it's all business in this dorm but unfortunately this is the real world and book worms don't grow on trees. I have a life, and i intend on keeping that life through hell and high water. This may make me sound ignorant but I've never met a soul who's had it all. Social acceptance happiness and good grades? It just doesn't happen and if you meet someone who says they have all those things in spades, they're lying. I certainly don't know everyone in the world and hey, I could be wrong, there could be such a thing as having it all but that's just too easy for my liking. so what does college mean to me? It's a balancing act, my friends my books and a smile, and I'm not frightened in the least to see which wavers first. That's the fun part after all.